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The Truth About Our Reluctance to Accept Nouman Ali Khan Victims

The Truth About Our Reluctance to Accept Nouman Ali Khan Victims

A series of allegations regarding inappropriate conduct by popular speaker Nouman Ali Khan hit a tipping point earlier this week.

A number of prominent Muslim-American community leaders have released statements through social media, with a substantial fraction of them asserting the claims of his gender-based and sexual misconduct to be true. Inappropriate messages with a number of women, most of whom were also being led to believe he was interested in marrying them, have surfaced in a series of screenshots on a website, that is authored by a group that says, “We are the victims of the womanising and lying of Nouman Ali Khan” on the homepage.

The photos in the screenshot conversations, which include photos of his body and other racy content, escalate in their aggressive, womanizing nature by direct references to multiple women about getting married simultaneously. In one of the messages, he threatens a woman’s job. There are also screenshots of what is believed to be a payment transaction as a bribery for silence about the matter.

The photos have also been widely circulated on Facebook, as seen on the profile of prominent community figure Rabia Chaudry, who says she has been in contact with victims and speaks to the veracity of the images.

“The accusations against him have been verified by multiple people, and some of them have even been confessed by him.”

This recent uproar is the latest and most viral addition to the unfolding story of Nouman Ali Khan’s indiscretions. It geared into full force this past Thursday, with statements including a long Facebook post by Omer M. Mozaffar, a Chicago-based chaplain.

Navaid Aziz, a well-known Canadian Muslim speaker, sheikh and Director at Al-Maghrib Institute, confirmed, “The accusations against him have been verified by multiple people, and some of them have even been confessed by him.”

Mozaffar was asked to investigate early allegations once they began to surface in Khan’s Dallas community. What began as a more quiet investigation turned into a larger ordeal when Khan himself violated the terms of the investigation, which included ceasing professional speeches, as well as contact with the women affected. Khan had admitted to some of the claims throughout these early stages, says Mozaffar.

Later, however, Khan began to pursue legal action against the various involved parties, including other community figures such as Mozaffar himself, escalating into the situation at hand. He has now denied all allegations. His major Facebook post in response began with, “I want to first thank those persons who have seen through the falseness of these allegations.”

Facebook and Twitter are exploding with reaction. While some deny the truth altogether – citing jealousy as a motivating factor for those who are posting in support of the accusations – others acknowledge that though the conversations may be authentic, there is nothing “threatening” about the messages. That they may, in fact, be dialogue between two consenting adults.

Considering that Khan did verify a portion of these claims earlier in the investigation, these allegations must have some truth to them. 

As is always, true, Allah knows both the best and the truth. That being said, many defenders of Khan claim such a divine “Allah knows best” ethic while disregarding the harm that is done by simply denying without examining the depth and complexity of the allegations.

Considering that Khan did verify a portion of these claims earlier in the investigation, these allegations must have some truth to them. Those who condemn figures like Mozaffar, Chaudry and the harmed women as liars fail to see the power dynamics that are at play in the situation. 

Consent is more complicated than a legal age or saying “yes” – it’s about the agreement between two people on fair, equal conditions. Any man with this amount of power, fame and wealth cannot engage in such clandestine and, frankly, sketchy activity and be considered of an “equal playing field” as with these women who don’t have a cult following. Khan’s threat to terminate one woman’s job and his bribe to silence another is a testament to the power-dynamics that were set in motion once he entered these relationships.

That’s why rules exist against teachers and students engaging in intimate relationships.

That’s why rules exist about bosses and employees engaging in intimate relationships.

Consent is more complicated than a legal age or saying “yes” – it’s about the agreement between two people on fair, equal conditions. 

The full spectrum of reactions defending Khan in this situation speaks greatly to the Muslim community’s attitudes toward the ideas of relationship and emotional abuse, along with sexual violence and assault.

His believers want evidence, which has been provided, yet they continue to deny the possibility of the misconduct. People are blaming Photoshop. This is the shield of fame and a cult-following at work. It is the human susceptibility to corruption, against whom no one, not even one’s favorite scholar, can be totally immune.

See Also

As Mozaffar said in his post, it is important to believe the stories of the victims, while still not sentencing the accused to a sealed fate. The culture of our communities is revealing itself to be inadequate of exploring this paradoxical state, at the entire expense of the voices of the victims. What this seeming contradiction is meant to foster, however, is less of a reaction to sorting through this exact NAK situation itself, and more about offering the tools for our community, especially its survivors, to navigate this desolate territory.

The judgments to this case are coming from a need to parse these accusations immediately. What it is missing from this approach is acknowledging that assaults of this nature are more than isolated events – within our community and beyond. Silencing women and our narratives to save the face of figures we trust is a cultural crutch that we’ve been socialized to lean on, and should no longer accept. 

If we fail to address issues of abuse at the price of seeming harmless to others, we are doing a disservice to survivors and non-survivors alike.

A common reason to refute the claims also speaks to the hypocrisy of our community in who we are willing to undercut as a price for safety.

Tackling narratives of sexual violence and misconduct cannot be equated to “airing the dirty laundry” while Muslims are already trying to live through a tough time of names, demonization and assumptions. That is simply sacrificing our values to pitch ourselves to Islamophobes or others of the like who simply wish to take any information about our community to use against us. If we fail to address issues of abuse at the price of seeming harmless to others, we are doing a disservice to survivors and non-survivors alike. If we think that covering up these allegations for the sake of protecting the name of the Ummah only damages a minuscule amount of women, then we are incorrectly gendering the victims of assault, as well as reducing the pain and struggles of fellow Muslims.

As Amanda Quraishi wrote on Facebook Saturday afternoon, “If the ‘Unity’ of your community depends on denying wrong-doing and suppressing the voices of people who have been hurt, marginalized or taken advantage of… guess what? You don’t have Unity. You have Oppression.”

This isn’t the first time an issue of this nature has hit the Ummah on such a scale. A little over two years ago, Mohammad Abdullah Saleem of the Chicago-area was accused of sexual abuse allegations, soliciting a report from a variety of national sources including the New York Times

Though options are somewhat scarce and we must do more to provide more, please refer to the below references if you or a loved one wants to know more about resources relating to sexual violence and assault, especially for Muslim survivors: 

Edited by Naaz Modan

View Comments (81)
  • This article is extremely one sided and poorly written. Yes, Nouman did things that are wrong and classify him as being corrupted BUT it takes two to tango. There is no way he would send these messages if there was no positive response from the females. Are they mad he was exploring his options for marriage? Jealous much? I swear feminism in muslim women is confusing because on one hand you complain of not being able to find husbands and on the other when a guy approaches/contacts you with your willingness you consider it harassment. This debate can go on and on but this post just reeks of feminism and really just makes me want to be distant from the matter. THERE ARE NO VICTIMS, only consensual ADULTS who made mistakes. Time to grow up and stop trying to paint a complete negative narrative.

    • Brother you nailed it these so called Muslim feminist are so confused if they fall in love they can sleep with a guy Christian or Muslim on the other hand if a guy approach them and try to contact them they say harassment
      You can’t ruin someone’s reputation in public, who gave them this right, of feminist what to naked inpublic go do it but don’t do the same with others

      • Brother you nailed it these so called Muslim feminist are so confused if they fall in love they can sleep with a guy Christian or Muslim on the other hand if a guy approach them and try to contact them they say harassment
        You can’t ruin someone’s reputation in public, who gave them this right, of feminist what to naked inpublic go do it but don’t do the same with others

        • You posted/spammed this same comment 3 times already. You whine and complain about Muslim feminists, but look at your own behavior. You’re behaving like someone insulted the Prophet (pbuh) or Allah. NAK is not a prophet, stop defending him like he is one.

          You go on about his reputation being ruined – that’s something he did to himself. A lot of Muslim women have pointed this out already, but NAK’s lectures were always filled with sexism and misogyny. It’s not a surprise that he treats women this way, but it is still outrageous and important to speak out against. There’s nothing Islamic about threatening to fire women, bribing women, lying to women, and taking advantage of women. Islam teaches us to speak out and stand firmly for justice, not be silent.


    thats not the legal definition, islamic definition or even cultural definition. But feel free to make stuff up to support you point. Great work! smh.

    • Actually, this is the definition that is used as a basis for ethical standing in many communities. For instance, in scientific research, you cannot legally consent as a participant unless you have equal power to the researcher. Otherwise, the dynamic is considered unethical due to risks of coercion. The same ideal applies to many other interactions. If the two adults do not have equal power in the situation, then the consent becomes one sided. Check the Belmont Report if you would like to see the history and reasoning for this.

  • these so called Muslim feminist are so confused if they fall in love they can sleep with a guy no matter Christian or Jews/atheist on the other hand if a Muslim guy approach them and try to contact them they say harassment
    You can’t ruin someone’s reputation in public, who gave them this right, if a feminist girl wants to get naked in public go ahead but don’t do the same with others
    Actually feminists don’t want to follow any Muslim leader specially male imam beacuse that’s a threat to their whole feminism concept at the same time they portray themselves as Muslim because they happen to be born in Muslim families

  • Prominent community leaders? Who, Omer Mozaffer? Conversations involving bribery and extortion? Do we have the full context? Prominent community figure, Rabia who? Nye Armstrong and Navaid Aziz verified what statements/accusations? Those accusations of Omer’s? Omer (I mentor mentors) Mozaffer just made the vaguest of accusations, making it sound like NAK gave quaaludes to women to take advantage of them… Investigation terms? Do we even know what was being investigated, and why they found it within their right to stop him from exercising his right to freedom of speech? If there was clear evidence of violence or assault, I’d be the first to condemn NAK, but give me a break. Calling anyone who is trying to be objective about this as being part of his cult, is very telling. Sorry, your article is painfully one-sided, unfair, and taking all the accusations (which are vague enough as it is) for granted.

    • Multiple women have come forth and testified against NAK, but the bottom line is that you simply do not trust Muslim women. That’s the larger problem here — Muslim communities constantly distrust and victim-blame Muslim women. It’s shameful and disturbing that there are people like you who are totally fine with male religious teachers or imams abusing their power and taking advantage of women.

      • Multiple women have ALLEGEDLY come forth. Can you name one? Neither can I. Have you heard their claims? I haven’t. That’s why what NAK is accused of is so murky. That doesn’t necessarily mean he’s innocent, but at the moment all we are trusting is hearsay.

        • That’s disingenuous and you know it. Muslim women are speaking anonymously because our community has constantly shown that it is not a safe space for them to address abuse. Muslim women are always stigmatized, shamed, and blamed whenever they speak out against Muslim men, especially prominent religious teachers or imams.

          Why would they come out into the public when we have a community where Muslim men are always defended? This reflects the larger problem of sexism and misogyny in our communities.

          • I recognize that Muslim women would face a lot of difficulty when they come forward, but at the moment I’m being asked to trust a stranger that his hearsay about “many” women are accurate. That’s just a poor standard, I could claim that I have secondhand knowledge that many people saw mastqalander84 committing a ton of crimes, but that’s not something you can defend yourself against.

            We actually DO have options, these women could write an anonymous letter explaining what happened. It would still have problems but it’s better than the current state. The people who tried to bring this alleged scandal to light did so in a really stupid way regardless, which is why you see this fighting and division. They kept it vague enough that it implied anything from actual serial rape to just shaking women’s hands. The lack of clarity has only damaged the credibilty of those accusing, and nobody benefits.

          • What constitutes “clarity” to you? It’s clearly not enough for you that multiple Muslim women have come forth and two Muslim men have confirmed these allegations, so what would be “clarity” to you?

            And let’s go beyond NAK: Why is it that every time, without fail, Muslim women speak out against abusive male religious teachers and imams, the first impulse from our community is to distrust them and ask, “Where is the proof, where is the evidence?” I have noticed this constantly in our community. We have normalized distrust of Muslim women, and that’s one of the larger issues here.

          • That’s the thing, multiple women have NOT come forth. Someone who I’ve never heard of before posted on facebook that they did. Hearsay. I could post that multiple children came forward to me that that you, mastqalander84, touched them inappropriately, and if anyone questions it I can say “it was confirmed and why are you in denial?”

            I’m only trying to figure out the truth here, but this is simply insufficient proof either way.

            I agree its messed up that the community is often too resistant to listen to a woman’s claims. But that’s partly due to messed up patriarchal culture, and also due to human nature that if you accuse a popular public figure of having a major scandal and essentially being two-faced then you will encounter skepticism. This isn’t a Muslim problem in particular, people just suck.

          • You’re contradicting yourself. On one hand, you acknowledge the problem of patriarchy in our communities, and yet, on the other, you are denying the fact that multiple Muslim women have spoken out. The posts did not start on Facebook. If you’re talking about Rabia Chaudry, she’s not the one who initially posted those text messages/screenshots. Those were images posted on a website created by the Muslim women NAK interacted with.

            As the article above clearly states, all of this was verified by Omer M. Mozaffar, Nye Armstrong, and Navaid Aziz. Why would they come forth and confirm these allegations? What’s in it for them? What’s in it for the Muslim women when they know full well that their community will turn on them and shame them (as it is already doing) for speaking out against NAK?

            Stop and reflect on that for a moment. No one comes forward for “fame” and “attention,” that’s ridiculous when you acknowledge the problems of patriarchy and misogyny in our community. You can’t blame these Muslim women for choosing to remain anonymous right now when our community has shown again and again that it is not a safe place for them.

          • I’m “denying the fact that multiple women have spoken out?” No. I’m skeptical to your idea that a Facebook post claiming they heard from anonymous women is identical to a situation where multiple named individuals directly come forward. I imagine things will change and more evidence may come out, at which point I can re-evaluate this.

            We’re living in a society where marriages break apart because unsubstantiated rumors spread that a friend of a friend saw someone kissing a non-spouse in a mall. We need a higher standard of proof than that. I don’t see how that is so objectionable, being cautious and looking for conclusive evidence. It could well be the man is guilty, but we won’t know at this stage with so little to go on.

          • Again, it wasn’t started by a Facebook post. The text messages and screenshots were posted on a website (which has been taken down) which was created by the Muslim women NAK interacted with.

            And I ask again, what would you consider “higher standard of proof.” If you can’t trust multiple Muslim women and the statements of verification from three other individuals, then what else would constitute “proof” for you? You’ve made it clear that the text messages and screenshots aren’t enough for you – OK, so state what your criteria for what “clear” evidence looks like.

          • Now you’re shifting the argument, rather than admit that hearsay is not evidence you point to some screenshots. NAK said after his divorce he worked with his family to find a new wife. I’ve seen the screenshots, they’re out of context clips from clearly longer conversations, some of them saying he loved this person and they should come to Texas soon. That’s evidence of inappropriate behavior? We made his private conversations public over what, him flirting with a girl he said he was considering for marriage?

            “If you can’t trust multiple Muslim women”

            Again, once more, we don’t have “multiple Muslim women.” We have a post on Facebook claiming multiple Muslim women exist. I can say here on Disqus that a dozen Muslim storeowners have told me MastQalander84 is a shoplifter. What, you don’t trust a dozen Muslim storeowners?

            I’m trying to be fair to you and logical. It’s quite possible NAK is guilty of something, the accusation is still not clear because the accuser was so vague. Rape? Adultery? Shaking hands with women? Any of those could be deemed “inappropriate” behavior towards a Muslim woman, but the accuser won’t say, and we still have no evidence. You’re giving me circumstantial stuff that just doesn’t pass muster. I’m not arguing he’s innocent, I’m saying there’s insufficient evidence either way. Can YOU tell me specifically what you think he did?

          • It seems like you didn’t read the article. All of the details regarding the reports and verifications are written there.

            The scenario you’re describing isn’t the same thing. If a person is caught shoplifting and there are several witnesses, it will be investigated. NAK’s case has been investigated – and is still being investigated – but Muslim women, and the 3 other individuals have come forth explaining details about what happened, including screenshots and text messages.

            Think about this: In NAK’s text messages to these women, he tells one woman to tell the imam that things between him and her ended. Then he says, “This will destroy me.” Why would NAK say those words if he didn’t know what he was doing was un-Islamic?

            He is also clearly threatening to fire and bribe women in those text messages. It was also mentioned that NAK was having these conversations with women while he was still married. Is this how you want a religious teacher to behave with Muslim women?

            If abuse occurs in the Muslim community and Muslim women speak out, how would you want them to handle it? And you keep ignoring my question, what constitutes “clear” evidence to you?

          • As a fellow Muslim woman let me add, this is not about distrust of Muslim women at all but by about 2 things:
            1- the fact that his reputation is/was actually so good that all his followers including Muslim women are finding such rumors hard to believe
            2- no real clarity as to what he really did? Talk to women for the sake of marriage? Even if a female Muslim scholar did the same I wouldn’t be so quick to judge!
            Also sorry but those accusing him have no clear story, and here I’m not talking about the women involved but mostly the scholars claiming vague terms like “verified sources” -and also saying there was nothing against anyone’s will was done and only adults are involved and there was consent on both ends..You can make what you’d like with vague statements like that….and lastly the involvement of “aL Maghreb” institute which also backed Abu Essa misogynyst remarks and still have not fired him from there organization to this day and now choosing to pick on another scholar…so not very trustworthy to me.
            And in the end iA if he’s telling the truth it will hopefully come forward in due time and if not we’ll find out.

          • The problem is, NAK has been giving sexist and misogynistic lectures for years. His lectures about gender relations are horrible and if you watch them now given the new context, they’re even more terrible. In one of the videos, he is blatantly blaming women for the way people perceive or think about them. For example, he says, “If you’re talking to some dude on campus and somebody from a distance can get the wrong idea… If it can be misinterpreted, then you shouldn’t be in that situation.”

            That’s basically blaming women for the way other people think about them. Yet there’s a double standard and the same directives are not applied to himself when he openly flirted with women WHILE still being married.

            I don’t have any objection against him wanting to remarry – I don’t believe there’s anything wrong with speaking to the opposite sex. The issue is about the way NAK treated these women. He threatened them, bribed them, and abused his power. The other issue is his hypocrisy and sexist double standards, which is so common among Muslim male religious teachers and imams: they’ll constantly point fingers and blame Muslim women, but when it comes to their own behavior, they don’t hold themselves accountable. Can you imagine how NAK would react if a Muslim woman sent a picture of herself to a Muslim guy and said, “Also excuse to show you skin”?

            I’m not saying that to shame anyone; just saying, why is there a double standard? Why does the Muslim community come to NAK’s defense when he does that when we know full well that we would be shaming Muslim women. Look at what’s happening with Mahira Khan and the way people are shaming her, yet we don’t see the same outrage about men like NAK who treat Muslim women horribly.

          • what about all the hurt and pain this is causing his children? his wife.. do they also deserve to have these accusations vaguely aired online??? No. Noone cared about women or victims because if this is true.. any thought how his wife must be feeling??? This was handled so unprofessionally I’m disgusted with the men that came forward making online accusations without full evidence. Regardles whether he was sexting or not. He is a man, a human being, and we all make mistakes.. shall we nail him to the cross now?? when’s the lynching mob coming?? pathetic people. This is family personal stuff, it has no business being aired in public on online social media. The 2 that need to answer will be those that flung the stones.

          • I don’t understand why people are framing this within the context of “sinful behavior that needs to be kept hidden.” The reason why this is out there is because it involves putting other Muslim women at risk. Do you believe sexual harassment and sexual abuse should be kept hidden too? If a Muslim man is abusing his power, taking advantage of Muslim women, threatening to fire them, telling them to lie about his relationship with them, trying to bribe them — should we just ignore it and not warn fellow Muslims, especially Muslim women?

            I’ve known of a Hafez who sexually harassed women in the community, and so many people shamed these Muslim women for speaking out. When you say this stuff should be kept private, does that mean we don’t hold these men accountable?

            No one is “nailing him to the cross” or “lynch mobbing” him. No one is advocating for that either. What’s most outrageous out of all of this is the way people are defending him and trying to depict him as the victim.

          • Your a complete disgrace, if the WIFE had wanted to make this public then that was her choice, not for some ‘small’ men to do so and bring embarrassment to his innocent children and wife?? what part of that don’t you understand?? No abuse is not kept hidden. We have a justice system. Reports to the police and sexual harassment charges can be made if necessary. Handled with the proper authorities. Not the way it’s being done. Hey it happens to ALL women of ALL religions and most of us know how to report or handle such situations properly. So not buying your garbage attitude. They can be sued for slander now as well.. hmmm brilliant way of handling things, hence why this seems false. just to make someone look bad.

          • If a Muslim man is harassing, abusing, threatening, and bribing Muslim women in the community, wouldn’t you want the community to know so that other Muslim women won’t be put in harm’s way?

            You keep bringing up his wife and children, yet you don’t express any concern for the well being of the Muslim women he abused. Why is that? No one is attacking his wife and children. NAK should have thought about his family before abusing his power.

            in several of his text messages, he urges women to lie about their relationship together. Then he says, “What have you done?” and “This will destroy me.”

            Why would he say those things if he wasn’t doing anything wrong? The reality is, he knew full well that his behavior and actions were WRONG.

          • I would have more sympathy for these women if a) this was handled in an appropriate way. that the women went with their allegations to the proper authorities and then authorities did proper investigation and such, that also protected the women and others’ like his family. The fact that they didn’t shows that they are trying to just slander him. Why are these women texting him??? It takes two thus blame is not only on him.

            Any harassment or abuse of any woman is not right and needs to be dealt with. Quit making this all about muslims. Are these women supposed to be texting men as well?

            Why didn’t these women go to the police if they felt they were being sexually harassed online??? Why is it a male person that accuses him? Why is it only part of the story out in the public? These women need to come forward and properly file charges if they feel they have been wronged. There is always 2 sides to a story. Most of what we have heard is hearsay.

          • You are distorting the facts. The first time anything was said about NAK was when Omer Mozzafar posted his Facebook message. The reason he did that is because NAK had violated an agreement that he would stop talking to these women. The agreement also included that NAK seek counseling and stop giving lectures.

            After NAK violated the agreement, THAT’S when the Muslim women posted the text messages and screenshots.

            Do you consider NAK’s text messages and interactions with the women Islamic? Is that how a role model should behave? On one hand, he discourages women talking to men, but on the other, he does the exact opposite of what he preaches.

            You blame the women, but you fail to recognize power dynamics. If a teacher harasses a student – the teacher is ALWAYS at fault because the teacher is in a position of power. The teacher carries more responsibility. The same logic applies here with NAK.

            And you are dodging my question: Why would NAK say “this will destroy me” if he didn’t know what he was doing was wrong? That’s the paradox in all of this when his supporters defend him. They fail to recognize what NAK pointed out himself: that he admitted his behavior was wrong without even realizing it.

          • get over it, or are you one of the stupid women that threw themselves at him or another man and been rejected???? there’s a right and wrong way to handle things, and this has been the WRONG way. We have laws follow them. Airing one’s dirty laundry on public social media is not appropriate.

          • I’m actually a Muslim man, but your comments just expose your attitudes about women. Reducing this down to, “These women are just fabricating stories because this guy rejected them” reinforces misogynistic narratives that women are “treacherous” and “vengeful.” It’s also an inaccurate narrative. You are far more likely to find men behaving abusively towards women after being rejected.

            Reducing these Muslim women in this manner is disingenuous and typical victim-blaming tactics. You’d really have to reach with that argument considering how the texts clearly show that NAK was the one enraged that *he* was being rejected. Did you miss the part where he threatened to fire one of the women? Or the part where one woman told him to stop lying?

            What would be the RIGHT way for women to confront sexism and misogyny in the community? If this is “wrong,” then explain the alternative.

  • Anonymous, false and fake messages or texts about Pakistani-American Muslim scholar Nouman Ali Khan, which were published in a fake website – – by some unknown, unidentified, or fictitious women/men, or enemies of Mr. Khan, are false, fake and misleading messages/texts because they do NOT prove that who are the actual writers of those fake texts/messages and they contain NO contact information about the anonymous persons (men or women) who first posted all those fabricated, libelous and malicious messages/texts in that fake website, which was shut down. Any wicked person can cunningly concoct and post fake messages/texts about anyone on the Social Media. Extremely stupid, perverted hypocrites – who have NOT posted any legal proof/evidence to prove that all those false/fake texts/messages are real/true – continue to criticize/defame Mr. Khan without any evidence/proof or without researching and finding the whole truth about this non-issue.

      • You “guest99” are another fake commenter with a fake name/ID. Our press-media is now deeply investigating the lies, disinformation and propaganda of all those “few other (fake) scholars”, who were exposed, opposed, condemned and criticized in the Social Media by countless persons for spreading their lies, disinfo and propaganda against Mr. NAK. We recently wrote and e-mailed our media’s letter to one of those fake scholars, but he is now hiding like a rat or mouse from our news-media and he has failed to answer our journalistic questions about the NAK-Fictitious Women issues.

    • You REALLY think those pictures of him are photoshopped too? Did someone hire Industrial Light & Magic and Lucasfilm to make a CGI image of Nouman Ali Khan????

      • You “mastqalander84” are a fake commenter. What is your full legal name and location (City/County, State/Province and Country)? Are you a man, woman, or LGBT? Why are you hiding your real identity behind your fake name or fake ID “mastqalander84” like all those so-called “Muslim women” who cunningly, deceptively and fraudulently defamed Mr. NAK? If they are real Muslim women, then why were they chatting with all those men who are not their relatives? Why were all those so-called Muslim women or fake “victims” sexting to other unrelated men, which is against the teachings of real Islam of Allah (God), Prophet Muhammad and Quran? Why has harmed its credibility by allowing anonymous persons to post their comments in the Website? Do NOT bother to reply with your fake “mastqalander84” name/ID because fake persons like you have ZERO/NO credibility. Yes, any photo/picture, image, or graphic can be changed, distorted, or edited in a photo editing software.

  • thank you for writing this with such clarity and insight. there is much work to be done in the community regarding violence against women and the many forms / shapes it can take. I have learned a lot from reading this. This is the first time I was on your site and, as a Muslim woman, your words speak to me.. I will subscribe to your email list. please continue doing the amazing work you are doing..

  • Great write up for encouraging people to support the victims.
    But not-so-great when it comes to encouraging people to stop vilifying the accused.

    We need to support the weak side, but also not bring down the strong side!! Let there be due process as we protect the victims AND the accused. Aameen.

      • Women are a fitnah, and Islam makes this clear. Feminism is from satanism. Why? One reason is how (in such environments) women who aspire to be like men and equal to men and have the double benefit of being afforded all the same opportunities as men, yet at the same time use their beauty and sexuality when needed and go back to taking advantage of patriarchal customs when needed (as these customs can never be fully eliminated because they are consistent with and part of human nature). There are many other reasons as well of course.

        Look to places like KSA and Afghanistan to see the correct way in which men and women should interact, and the correct way in which rights are afforded to both. No, these are not perfect countries and one is in a state of war while the other mixes unIslamic laws with the Shariah. Nonetheless, these are bastions of Islam and piety in a time and in a world that has become overwhelmed by satanic feminism, hedonism, and infidelity.

          • Misogyny can be wrong and evil, and the worst forms of misogyny are actually the result of feminism. So don’t you get it? Feminism harms both men and women. Feminism causes men to go overboard with misogyny, and it causes women to go overboard with gender equality. The correct understanding is that both sexes have rights over one another (not one having complete right over the other, nor both have the same and equal rights with one another). Patriarchy is the natural order of things. Feminism is linked to the fall of societies after they have been established (usually by patriarchy), satanic and hedonistic values, homosexuality, and so forth. It has destroyed our surrounding culture and society as we speak. Sadly, those who are part of right-wing movements in the west, while acknowledging this to some extent, continue to preach freedom which ends up benefiting feminism (though they complain about it at the same time). Stay away from the hypocrites and the faithless. Erase any pride you have, and follow Allah (swt) and the religion of truth (Islam) fully.

          • In fact, it is very accurate and spot on. Think about it. An ideology that calls for women to be independent of men, yet interact with men (free-mixing) and work alongside men in equality and be able to wear what they want regardless of the effect this has on others (whom again, they freely interact with). This leads to increased pre-marital relations, pre-marital sex, a need for birth control, free-sex (which increases homosexuality), infidelity, other strange types of relations and sexual acts, and in turn, broken families and mental illnesses of all kinds. One has to do away with religious laws and norms and setup a secular or semi-secular framework to achieve the aims of feminism. All together, it is satanic values then that result from feminism and its empowerment. I don’t want to look up the quote, but various satanists including Anton Levy have said that sexuality and the female form is the most powerful thing they can use to corrupt others. And if one goes back to the feminist manifesto itself…it is clear that the origins of feminism are found in wanting sexual freedom more than gender equality. You may as well paint a pink pentagram on the next feminist you see.

          • Nah, what this all comes down to is you wanting to control women. You’re threatened by the idea of women being independent and making decisions on their own.

          • I would much rather stay at home and play video games and have a lady do all the work. So not at all. Despite such wishes, it would not be very masculine of me. We were created differently and then given different responsibilities. When we go away from that, we destroy the foundation of society (the family) and open the door for all kinds of evil. The evil djinn want nothing more than this; they want nothing more than to empower women…for this also empowers female sexuality. And that leads to the downfall of men, and consequently, women as well.

          • Is that what you think feminism is? A woman working while her husband stays at home and plays video games? LOL.

            Feminism is a movement to end sexist oppression. Full stop. The feminism you’re describing is white feminism.

            Read “Feminist Theory: From Margin to Center” by bell hooks. You’ll learn a lot.

          • Of course not, that was an example. How can you miss all my points while concentrating on that (lol)?

            There is no such thing as sexist oppression. Men have rights over women and women have rights over men. When you lie and go against this and try to force gender quality…you destroy families and societies. You spread sexual immorality…and that is exactly what has happened in countries and areas where feminism is strong and has political clout and political success. Again, women have rights over men…that is not feminism. Nor is it sexist oppression to say that men have rights over women. And at the end of the day – the man is the head of the household. Men are the leaders (in society in general, and within families in particular). There can be some exceptions here and there, but that doesn’t change the general reality. Feminism wants to change the general reality and in doing so…they are falling into satan’s trap (and they end up oppressing themselves in the process)!

            And you can’t separate feminism from western or “white” feminism. All the naked and half-naked European/Roman women that are showcased on the Internet and on billboards and in all corners of society (in front of young and old) – this is the result of feminism. All the while, women actually have it worse since men, not adhering to the responsibilities they were accustomed to in patriarchal societies, can just leave a the feminist-loving woman to raise the children and provide for them at the same time!

            The fight for women’s rights in places where they are not given their correct rights should not be called feminism. I have yet to encounter any genuine form of feminism that accepts patriarchy. Perhaps your book recommendation will change my mind on that. But again, if men are the head of the household and the leaders of society and have the additional responsibilities that come with that – then patriarchy is the way it is going to be. It is the natural order of things, and the environment and context that Judaism (in its original form), Christianity (in its original form), and Islam (in its authentic form) arose in and set regulations regarding. Don’t let materialism, capitalism, secularism, hedonism, and the oppression of polytheism cause you to lose the correct perspective regarding this world and the human species.

          • You stopped reading a long time ago…satan has confused you and you have fallen for the great western deception of feminism and gender equality.

          • What if I asked you the same thing with regards to your judgements against “sexist oppression” and so forth? If we didn’t judge, we would have nothing to discuss or debate.

          • You consistently behave like you’re all knowing and God-like. That’s shirk.

            I’m done talking with you.

          • Be careful in accusations of that magnitude, for they could come back at you. Once a person goes down the path of attribution with regards to the creation…it never ends. See how shirk crept into the various minority sects (Shia, some non-Sunni Sufis, Ahmadiyyah, Nation of Islam, etc.).

          • Did I? Well, I guess that is a compliment. I am an avowed enemy of the “Madkhalis” and their branch of the Salafis. The Salafis overall are varied like other schools of thought within Islam. They are part of Sunni Islam and that is the only distinction I identify myself with. You can’t excuse shirk and major sins of the other minority sects, so this was your way of deflection. Of course, as a feminist, you might like the Shia practice of muta (temporary marriage). For such values (whatever outer form they take) are always what results form feminist ideology. Satan takes you in stages.

          • The categorisation of McGriff as a misogynist is based on a number of interactions.
            Given that the Sunnah endeavours to replicate the practices / views of a 1400 year old culture it reflects the prejudices / ignorance of that time.
            This was unarguably prejudicial with respect to women. In addition all the Abrahamic faiths are inherently patriarchal.

          • Yes, inherently patriarchal and that’s a good thing. Disagreement does not equate to hatred. We are allowed to have a different view on what is best for women. I feel especially entitled, since I am a woman, and one who has suffered mightily thanks to feminism.

          • Any ideal / belief that strays into extremism risks doing harm. I find the more militant feminism to of this type HOWEVER that does not mean that the goal of equality for women and their rights is not the ethical path.

          • In that case, you are upon extremism for anyone can come up with any idea/belief in which the opinion of another is extreme by comparison. So that was a silly statement. The ethical path is to admit the differences between men and women and acknowledge that both have certain rights over one another. It is not unethical or oppressive to say that men have certain rights over women and women have certain rights over men. What is unethical and oppressive it go beyond this in one way or another, or to force gender quality (which never worse in actuality).

          • The rights over each other that you claim exist are in practice those that are prejudicial and disadvantageous for women. This is evidenced by the poor measurements of health, education, justice and all other measures of human development where sharia or its variants exist.

          • Wrong – it is women today who are judged on account of appearance thanks to the “equality” and secular freedoms that are now erroneously given to women that causes a great deal of prejudice and disadvantage (as well as self-confidence issues) towards women. And those women who now have to work and fend for themselves while raising kids are yet another example of how feminism and gender quality has failed them. For without patriarchy, men have the option to leave both their wife and their kids. The same ideology that demands that women have right over their bodies and anything that comes out of it…leads them to have to be the primary care-taker of children. On top of that, they want to be equals in the work force! Yet, complain and live in misery when they are left all alone to perform the double-duty of working and raising the children!

            Shariah exists no where as there is no independent Muslim state. The issues you described in the Muslim world are on account of extreme poverty, oppression, tyranny, foreign domination, and the fact that Muslims have abandoned their shariah (whether in part or whole).

            Men and women are partners and the family unit is the centerpiece of any healthy society. Western society is no longer healthy. It is filled with broken families, infidelity, hedonism, greed and corruption, racism and nationalism, and empire and wars of aggression (which is what keeps it all together as it is). When the latter falls apart, expect a very harsh reckoning; and expect reality to return and people to fall back to patriarchy, for that is truly the natural inclination and status of the human species.

            One of these days, you may just finally get things right.

          • When have women not been concerned with appearance. It’s an evolution thing. E.g. Human female breasts are far larger than necessary for the feeding of children. While I agree that the objectification can go too far the real perversion is that of hiding the female form.
            Your claim that patriarchy prevents the abandonment of women and children is not supported by history. What it does do is condemn women to a potential live of abuse and exploitation. The optimum family environment for children and society is one where it survives due to respect and affection not by way of the social coercion you advocate.

          • Yes, this concern always exists…but putting it out in the open makes matters much worse, and seduces the society as a whole. Such seduction is a basis for committing evil acts. Private concern for appearance just for the sake of one’s spouse is very different from public concern for appearance to make money and influence friends and strangers alike and so forth.

            Enough with the evolution nonsense. I’ve heard arguments from the ignorant saying that evolution will make one gender or the other useless one day, or that A.I. and robotics is the next stage of evolution. These are just the ramblings of ignorant disbelievers.

            Hiding the female form is the exact opposite of perversion (or more accurately, greatly minimizes it). Objectification is a part of and branch from perversion. Perversion itself is a consequence of sexuality generally, and open sexuality specifically. Its important to get the order of things right here. Another way to think of it: sex is a natural act just like eating is. But what happens when you eat too much? On the other hand, those who don’t eat much are more thankful for the food they have, and live otherwise healthy lives as compared to those who are well fed (excluding other environmental factors). Putting all kinds of food out in the open will of course cause people to want to eat more and more and develop eating disorders. Hiding the food and only bringing it out when a person needs to eat…minimizes this and prevents the showing off of whatever food one has in front of the poor and hungry and so forth. Now this isn’t a perfect analogy (we have to take into account exercise and stress and so forth) – so don’t overthink it.

            The real, unending sexual pleasures are waiting as a reward for those who do good – in the Hereafter. That is where for example, an orgasm can last years or decades, and a person can revert back to being a virgin after every sexual act, and there is no such thing as nervousness or jealousy or boredom or not loving your spouse(s), and so forth.

            Patriarchy prevents the abandonment of women and children and the rise of divorce and broken homes, and this is supported by history. Women are being abused and exploited throughout the free, secular, feminist west. So the reality is actually the opposite of what you say, or some of these things are the natural result of differences between men and women and so will always exist no matter which society we live in (particularly among poor communities). Again, what a terrible fate women in the west have where they have to both work and take care of the children. A society and ideology that permits this, sees it become widespread, and justifies it – has lost all semblance of morality. And that is only one example of the myriad of ways that the western system and feminism have cause disruption and destruction in the societies that adopt such principles.

          • Patriarchy is our natural and obvious inclination. Nothing from just 1400 years ago nor even something unique to Islam or the Abrahamic tradition. But because you are unable to separate yourself from the ignorance of your own time and place…you are lost as a slave to satanic and hypocritical feminist propaganda. You have no argument.

  • If he made the texts and was really interested in getting married after his divorce, he should have followed Islamic tradition of having an intermediary arrange meetings so that nothing could be misinterpreted. All of this could have been avoided just by following the rules. That’s why they are there. There should have been no private text messages between a teacher and student or employee – for his own safety if nothing else.

    I was watching him from time to time and after awhile I got the impression that he was a little arrogant – making ironic comments about his wife and family. If you are a public figure, you just can’t do that. People would laugh at these little jokes, but it’s not right. And his teaching style leaves him open to criticism as well: he tries to connect with people in a non-authoritarian, down-to-earth way, but that kind of laxity destroys the boundary that has to exist between teacher and student. His delivery of his teaching was flawed in that regard. However, he’s not the only teacher who is.

    I know text messages can be “created” by certain software, so while the messages are damning, they may not be real. Who knows without better evidence? On the other hand, the text messages are just disjointed enough to be true. They don’t seem cooked up to me.

    I’ve lived long enough and been a victim often enough to know that if you are a woman, even your own family doesn’t take you seriously. At the same time, these girls should not have been engaging in such conversations, which they made public. They should be ashamed to talk so personally with a teacher. This is the danger of “mixing.” I get the impression from the texts that the girls were in awe of him; however that doesn’t excuse them. Anyway, how old were these “girls.”

    He seems guilty to me. You probably wouldn’t want me on your jury.

  • The problem is so many of Nak supporters are women themselves, many of the may even want a shot at being in naks’s harem of rotating wives. The problem is not so Nak who is basically taking what is celebrity has given him. Problem is people have taken this man to be some sort of revival type figure and don’t really care what he does probably bc rest of Muslim leadership has failed them. Nak is the Donald trump of Muslim youth. He can get away with murder bc his followers will simply say it’s all fake news

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