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5 Reasons Most People Fail to Quit Porn — And How To Succeed This Time

Porn is everywhere now, from billboards to imposed beauty standards. Our community is becoming more and more shuttered because of it. Marriages, relationships, and even kinships collapse just because of it — and guess what? Muslim or not, your gender, or assigned sex, has no role in your struggles with porn. And chances are, you might’ve tried a few times to quit, and yet failed.

Since it is totally normal, and is something that happens even to the best of us, here are five reasons why you failed every time you tried, and what you should do this time.

You Try to Resist Temptations

Generally, anything in life that you want to overcome has to be away from your sight. In other words, don’t expose yourself to temptations and then try to resist them. You just remove them out of your sight.

So, do you want to move on from your ex? Go to other places than the ones your ex goes to and keep their pictures out of your sight. Want to quit smoking? Stay away from tobacco corners. Want to quit procrastinating? Start your day by making your bed. Similarly, want to quit porn? Stay away from the cues that trigger it in the first place.

You Fear What You Don’t Know

It’s normal to be hesitant about breaking any bad habits. After all, any habit we have, even a bad one, is a comfort zone for us, and breaking it for whatever reason will only mean stepping into an uncharted territory that we know nothing about. 

But, remind yourself that it’s normal to hesitate and wonder, “what would I do after I quit whenever I feel ‘so and so’?” You need to understand that obsession mostly, in and of itself, is a, rather unhealthy, coping mechanism. So, in order to overcome any obsession, you need to replace these toxic coping mechanisms with their healthy counterparts. And, in that case, intense workouts on a regular basis is what you need.

Any habit we have, even a bad one, is a comfort zone for us, and breaking it for whatever reason will only mean stepping into an uncharted territory that we know nothing about. 

“If you’re a male, and train for a large number of hours of training, or it’s at a high intensity, your libido will decrease,” said Dr. Anthony Hackney, professor of exercise physiology and nutrition.

Harkirat Mahal, CEO of MotivatePT frequently sees this in women, citing one woman who “trained for a marathon, half-marathon and triathlon in a single year, which meant an hour’s combining strength, bodyweight resistance and cardio five days a week.”

“With the stress on her body, pressure of the races — and resulting exhaustion — she confided in me that her sex drive had disappeared,” Mahal said. “When she dropped to twice-weekly workouts after competing, her sex drive would return.”

Your Unconscious Mind’s Received Signals Scream, “This Isn’t Gonna Work Out for Life”

Perhaps it’s because you don’t believe in yourself, or because you’ve already tried before and things never worked out for you — so much so you became  so convinced of the idea that it’s just not possible for you.

Either way, it’s all about redefining your possibilities, also known as your mindset. Make sure you don’t break any pattern because it’s a requirement for something else. Rather, do what you have to do because you want to do it. Once you adopt this mindset of “I want to do this” instead of “I should do this,” you’ll develop your own momentum.

Feed your subconscious mind with positive affirmations and mantras that will remind you of your own strength and invincible capability of reclaiming your control over every aspect of your life.

You Tell Yourself “One Last Time Won’t Hurt”

Sorry to be the one to break it to you, but you can never make any change if you think to yourself “Let me do what harms me one last time before I quit,” because then, every time will be that “one last time.”

Just as you know that you can’t be a champ without practice, know that you won’t as well be able to overcome your obsession without taking action.

You Don’t Have The End in Mind

No matter what your faith is, if you believe in God, the power that makes this universe provide you with the very things you’d like to attract, then there has to be this part within you that wants to do good as an act of gratitude and love for Him. 

Luckily, if you don’t even believe in the existence of God, you still have that desire to do good — that’s the end you want to keep in mind whenever you try to push further.

So, always relate everything you do to your higher calling and life purpose. No matter your spirituality practice, just connect with your inner self, practice breathing, and remind yourself of why you’re really doing what you’re doing.