Think about it. It’s subconscious, but you’re with yourself and your own company all the time. No one experiences you as you do. No matter how much another person might mean to you, they will never know you more than you know yourself, even if you think they do. I learned this personally through living alone, and also with having loved ones around me no matter where I went. In university, I started traveling a lot, and experienced ups and downs. I realized, hey, I’m the only one who can pick myself up. People leave, whether intentionally or not. Haven’t we all experienced our share of people leaving?
Over time, I realized that I’m going to go far and wide, wherever that may be, and I’m the one who’s going to have my own back. It’s always going to be a process; I’m learning to love my own company. Don’t get me wrong, others are important too. We’re still social beings and need human attention. I just find comfort in knowing I’m my own home.
Home. It’s been quite a ride with that word. I didn’t know where home was for a long time. For a good minute, I thought it could be a person. I thought ‘they’ can come with me wherever I go. Then, for a second I thought it was where I’m from. Then, where I was born. Then, where I live. Frantically trying to find a home brought me to the conclusion that I’ve been carrying it all around. I finally realized that it was me. I carry home wherever I go. I am the structure, the exterior, the interior, and the actual feeling of home.
I can be attached to a place; that’s normal. Though, as a person with my own certain kind of experience, home can be taken away in one breath.
Whether you find home spiritually, religiously, or through creativity, always look to yourself first. I was asked to write a passion piece, and all I have been passionate about is writing about experiences that pertained to one thing: how I handle situations, what I learned from them, and how I found protection within myself.
What I learned from different experiences made me grow with self-love. Moreover, with self-love comes self-sufficiency. With a world like this, I’m going to need it endlessly. We all do, one way or another.
Find your own ways. Don’t take the easy route if it means that you will not learn the elusive art of self-sufficiency. It may sound cheesy, but think about it. You are your own world. You are your own home. And as long as you understand that, and nurture your being, you will never be lost for long.