Not sure why my melanin attracts so much ignorance, but here are just a few of those gems. You know? The questions black women get asked because apparently when you have brown skin all rules of engagement go out the window.
1. “Can I touch your hair?”
This is never a good idea and not something that people like. Guess what? Black women are people too. So just, no. Don’t do that.
2. “You’re the Whitest Black girl I know.”
FYI. This is not a compliment.
3. “You’re so pretty. What are you mixed with?”
I’m Black and Magic.
4. “You speak so well.”
I’m sorry, was I supposed to sound like a monkey?
5. “I don’t think of you as Black.”
Well, I am. So stop trying to erase my identity. That’s not okay.
These questions and statements stem from a bigger systematic racial divide, which is a part of what makes them so hurtful. Black women are not animals at a petting zoo, we are not wannabe White girls or some sort of inarticulate alien that surprisingly isn’t ugly. Whatever the intent behind these questions and statements, understand the consequences. Your curiosity and ignorance is not more important than our dignity.
It’s not okay to tell someone you don’t see them for who they are. It’s not okay to judge someone’s intelligence based on the color of their skin. It’s not okay to imply that being Black and beautiful can only come from outside influence. It’s not okay to be so ignorant about a person that you forget to treat them like a human being.
If you want to have a conversation, lets have a conversation. I’m a huge fan of understanding people, culture etc. (seriously guys, I majored in psych), but there is a way to seek understanding without offending the one you are trying to understand. If that is indeed your intention, if not…