By Starting a family is a beautiful thing if it is something you want. For me, I’ve always known that I wanted a baby, but the idea of getting married and moving away to a new country was too much to handle — so I decided to wait. And now I’ve been married for two years.
I suppose the “white noise” (which is what I call the sounds coming out of the aunties’ mouths who are always asking me when I’ll get pregnant) has gotten louder.
So now, it’s game time.
Although I have opened my mind and heart to the idea of starting a family, it hasn’t really been as simple for me as it has for others. I guess I expected it to happen right away. I never thought it would take this much effort.
So, since it has taken longer than I thought it would, I’ve resorted to asking around for advice, I’ve pinterest-ed ideas, and I’ve researched hadith to give me some sort of guide.
If you are in the same boat as me, here are some tips to conceiving that I’ve gathered:
1. Keep a good diet
Pomegranate
It is narrated from the Prophet (PBUH): “Eating pomegranate is a cause of increased sperm production for men and makes the child beautiful and healthy as well.” (Wasāil ash-Shī~a, vol. 25)
Whole Grains
These regulate blood glucose and insulin levels, which aids in fertility.
Leafy Greens, Avocado, Broccoli, and other vegetables and beans
These are rich in folic acid.
2. Keep a good state of body and mind
Wudhu & Remembrance of Allah
“Those who have faith and whose hearts find rest in the remembrance of Allah (SWT); Look! The hearts find rest in Allah’s (SWT) remembrance!” (13:28)
De-stress
Stress is never a good thing, find your way to relax. It can a long bath, yoga or anything that works for you.
Quit Smoking, Alcohol & Drugs
Smoking can reduce fertility up to 50 percent; drugs cause abnormal and weaker sperm and can also cause ovulation problems in women.
Maintain a healthy weight
3. Don’t forget to make those regular doctor visits
Check your hormone levels! And talk to your doctor about conceiving and about taking vitamins.
4. And, of course, have lots of sex!
Of course, having sex is key. The more you do, the higher your chances will be. However, planning when you are ovulating and having sex before you ovulate is important.
TIP: You can raise your legs “to make the sperm reach your eggs faster,” but according to doctors, it doesn’t really make a difference. (I’ve been advised to lay on my right side. I don’t know if it works, but it doesn’t hurt to try.)
Above all, understanding that everything happens with God’s will has kept me grounded. It’s a journey and a process — and when He wills you to conceive, it will happen.
Heck, you list a whole lot of stuff to get pregnant – two years of marriage, vitamins, vegetables, prayers, doctors, and what not – but missed on the one item that replaces that bundle, bush and kaboodle: A Man!
Go get that one missing ingredient that will put the rest to work. Go find a man who can bang you good, deep down. You will have one in the oven right away, in your arms in nine months. You will have fun doing it too, making that baby. I promise !